Ideas to improve the board - post them here!

[Erin]

It's almost the six month birthday of our new WellSpouse BBS and time for an evaluation of what could make this board even better.

We moderators are soliciting ideas from you, so post them here! We will consider them and make changes accordingly at the end of April in celebration of our half birthday.

Thanks again for making this such a great place to hang out for all of us!

[shortchanged]

Erin,
How about a delete/edit function for our posters. I know we have the oppourtunity to preview before we post, but in some cases we might want to edit or delete our post after the fact.

I write on another BB for my hobby of lighthouses, and find I use these functions....not often, but occasionally.

Anyone else agree or disagree?

Pam

[Erin]

Pam,

This was discussed at the very beginning to the board set up. Because this board is such a sensitive place and the issues discussed are sometimes very painful and personal, I/we decided that it was important that people be always accountable for what they say and not be able to retroactively edit their comments. I understand that it might seem odd, but having a non-edit function there makes people a little bit more aware of what they are saying and the effect it might have on other people, I believe.

As always, if there is something you post that you want edited or changed, please pm me -- I'm happy to change it for you.

I think we forgive one another our spelling and other errors -- I sometimes correct these if they are in topic titles, but very rarely. I never correct another person's post unless they ask me to, fyi, even though I am able to.

Something to think about.

[BrettMT]

Erin, I don't know the rules you must work under, but I was wondering if it would be possible to make my post about the Yahoo group in the Intimacy section a sticky. That way anyone new would be able to see it right up front rather than having to rely on word of mouth.

Another thought is to make the Frapper map post sticky too since it contains the link to the map.

Just some thoughts.

Brett

[russell]

I would love it if spell check was on this site

you all know how bad my spelling is Russ

[Silver Swan]

I too miss having Spell Check and editing in this Forum, but it does make me proof read even more and even then I have missed some mistakes, to my later chagrin.

I know that good spelling does not come to all of us. I also think that the "warts and all" nature of this Forum does give a more complete picture of all of us - our way of expressing ourselves, our regret at not spelling better, etc. We cannot "air brush" our little short comings as well here and that is more interesting I think, strange as that may sound.

Thanks to all who bare their souls here. We learn from each other.

Shirley H.

[quovadis]

I would love it if spell check was on this site
you all know how bad my spelling is Russ

After reading something that is of interest and wishing to opine, I open Microsoft Works Word Processor and whack out the trivia u b reading now, da kine..

[quovadis]

As always, if there is something you post that you want edited or changed, please pm me -- I'm happy to change it for you.

How about just plain "goofs"?
I have one on another page..

[Guest]

I was wondering if we could have a section under the index that simply read: HUMOR.

Everyone who wants to, could post some funnies and that way it would be available to anyone who needed a smile, laugh, etc, when they don't have anyone to talk to or no one replies to them?

Am sure that the jokes would have to be forum appropriate for the general public, but if they were "off color" maybe they could be seen when people log in, just like the one on intimacy, which can only be accessed after logging in?

The reason am asking is because there are jokes throughout the forum and maybe it would be helpful to keep them all in one place?

Just a though.

[Erin]

Every time I see a joke or something unrelated to illness, I post it in "Wellspouses are People too." I intended that to be the diversion forum, the place where we can go just to be us.

[Railroad]

Add a Frustrations and Tantrums area. Sometimes we have stuff to vent about that isn't personal, isn't about a specific illness, and doesn't include help for anyone - except for the venting poster!

[Erin]

Vent Vent all you like! It helps us too, you know, Railroad.

Being here has allowed me to lose my anger and laugh more since I get a small vent/rant every time I see one posted. Don't think you're only helping yourself -- it eases the rest of us when we read what you are going through too. "Help and Healing" is a good place for that.

As I've said before, I hate to delineate the forum more because the question of "where to post" just gets more complicated.

[kqbear]

I would like to see a board for those of us who's spouse is moderately impaired. We still do the caregiving and experience a lot of frustration but it is hard to express those feelings to others who's spouses are so much more ill than ours. I feel bad when I grumble about my IS having a flare up when I know others have spouses that don't have good days at all.

[Erin]

Hey kq!

I'm here and my spouse is VERY high functioning compared to most others, especially on good days. On a good day, no one would ever suspect...

We all have slightly different situations and you shouldn't compare your situation to others. You're here cause you're a wellspouse, no matter the sickness, or level thereof, of your spouse. So don't feel bad about complaining, ruminating or muttering about wellspouse-hood. We all understand and won't judge if we perceive our situation to be worse or better. Regardless, it would be very hard to categorize people into how badly off they have it.

[Richard]

Hey kqbear!

The point is not how bad or less bad your spousal caregiver experiences are. Rather, ask yourself this: does your spouse's illness and/or behavior change from day-to-day or week-to-week (over short time periods) so that it has a significant effect on you, compared to the way things were before? Are you mourning the losses, which can be as little as, (due to fatigue) that your spouse no longer picks up stuff or puts clothes in the laundry basket or does something with dirty dishes. If more and more you are being affected by these things, however big or little, then you are a spousal caregiver, and can work towards doing things for yourself, too, as a Well Spouse.

Peace